Forensic Mantra – “Friends” but no friends!
By Ramin Mesgarlou, AKA The Forensic Networker
So, you are puzzled why you are losing some so called “friends” since you launched your new DS/MLM profession. You are wondering what happened to some of those relationships and why some are even talking negatively to you or behind your back.
Point 1: IT’S NORMAL so don’t be shocked, it’s NOT unique to you.
Point 2: It’s not their reaction that you should be concerned about; it’s YOUR reaction that makes all the difference.
Over the past 26 years, I have seen some old friends turn to acquaintances and eventually strangers. A few even went beyond and became negative not because of anything that I did, but because of how my success made them feel.
You have to understand when you take decisive actions in your life to make some positive changes that tips the balance between you and some of your circle. This is especially true when you start to see success and all of a sudden you see some of your most trusted “friends” start to disappear. The question you will always have is WHY, so I am here to tell you the Forensic Networker philosophy on this phenomenon.
There are two reasons why your so-called “friends” will abandon you or change their behavior towards you when you start your own business and see success.
- PURE ENVY, you were once on the same platform as them but now you are constantly elevating emotionally, intellectually and financially while they remain the same. The gap widens between where you are at and where they have remained as time goes by and soon you sound and think different than they are and there is very little commonality between you. You are still a nice person, still like them and want to maintain your relationship because you are very comfortable and happy with your new position but that personal satisfaction will cause jealousy with some of your “friends”.
- Your success is a reminder to them that they have failed to evolve and improve themselves and their lives. Every time they see you and your success it reminds them that they have not fulfilled their lives and their full potential. That is not a good feeling for them. In other words, when they see your changes and decisions and successes, it forces them to look in the mirror and either admit how they failed or resent you for elevating your life.
Group 2 are not bad people, they are just the masses that are sitting on a nail and complain about everything. They refuse to make any changes and every time someone close to them makes those changes, it makes them uncomfortable because it reminds them that they need to change and that they are not ready to do.
So there you have it. Some were just convenient friends (not friends) and some were friends but your progress makes them realize things that they don’t want to realize. Being used to the STATUS QUO LIFESTYLE is no different than being addicted to drugs or alcohol.
People who abuse substances are well aware that what they are doing is wrong but don’t want to be reminded of it. Masses who struggle with their daily lives, desire more for their family and children are also aware that they need to make changes but some are not ready to be reminded of that reality so they avoid you. The ones who are ready will join you and the ones who are truly friends will be happy for you and be supportive even if they are not ready to join you.
So “Friends but no friends”, IT’S NORMAL. You will lose a few “friends” but the great part about DS/MLM is the social aspect where you make tons more real friends who are actually happy for you and share the same mindset as you.
SO, IT’S NOT THEIR REACTION THAT COUNTS, IT’S YOURS …
Hopefully, someday we will meet at one of the Forensic Networker Intensive Universities and I will share with you all my “friends but no friends” stories and soon you will realize that when Forensic says “Become more” and “elevate yourself” it’s a reality of success mindset that the masses including some of your friends and family will not be comfortable with. From the person who has made the transition, I am here to tell you that THE TRADE OFF IS WORTH IT. Shed some “friends” for tons of new friends plus the success that the transition will bring for you and your family.
The poster below demonstrates my DS/MLM journey to success over the past decade. Read it closely because it will be your blueprint to success. It might not have much to do with your friends and family but then it might.
Forensic Mantra “Friends but no friends” by Ramin Mesgarlou, AKA The Forensic Networker.
Forensic Networker Intensive University – Toronto, 2013
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